That is NOT what I said!

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I guess I am intended to write about this today. Why? Because a friend on Facebook posted a status about this subject and then I had a personal moment where I went through the same thing. So I guess YOU have spoke! I do pray daily that you will lead me to a topic each day and that I will recognize it when it appears!

People will hear what they want to hear. It does not matter what you say- they will hear it the way their brain hears it. That is not to say they will always get it wrong! No! They may get the essence right but it will be repeated in their words. The words their brain has interpreted from your conversation and then stored to, unfortunately all too often, be repeated to others. And then sometimes, way too often, they do not get the essence at all. They aren’t even in the same ballpark! It happens.
Sometimes it is a small thing, like hearing a name wrong or a simple word heard wrong…. Yet other times it is a big deal… Such a big deal It can cause real harm to relationships. It can be the fodder for the rumor mill. That’s when it needs to be addressed and the person doing this needs to accept responsibility for it. That person must be able to let go and realize the person they are speaking of ( you) may indeed be being misrepresented…..by them!

I feel if we all would accept the fact that it is human nature to hear things the way we hear them and not necessarily the way it was truly said; and this is not necessarily done with malintent…. Then we would all be better off.
Once again we get down to accountability and perception ! We have to take responsibility for ourselves and our actions. And realizing our perception of things and that we can skew what we hear, and how we interpret things, will be the first step towards change.
I’m not saying we are all bad people. I am saying it is pretty common to hear things wrong, to get the emotion behind the comment wrong……it happens. Now we need to accept it and move on. If we can accept it we can change it. Right?

I see….You see……We all see….something DIFFERENT!

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Isn’t the human mind a wonderful thing? We can witness the same situation, yet remember it entirely different. We can make a plan, yet we will both get details wrong. We have a conversation and 10 minutes later think we were talking to someone else!  It is indeed an amazing thing!

When it comes to business, we need a written plan, but not just that, this is also why we need signed contracts. Don’t be offended when a contract comes into play. It is really a good thing.  I have learned, from experience, that even a friend will disagree or worse yet…..just decide to disappear and not honor your “plans” !  So get a business plan and contract in writing.  Yes, even with friends! (especially??)

Our penchant for getting the details wrong is an interesting flaw characteristic! And it is not exclusive to only certain people. It is a characteristic that we all have..sorry. Good news is, we may have it, but we do not have to exercise our right to use it!  We can, and many of us do, practice the art of listening!  If you learn to listen, really listen, you will cut your error rate way down!  ** Note to anyone who needs to hear it…… listening intently for the person to be quiet long enough for you to get a word in edgewise=not listening!  Just saying!

Will this fix the problem? Not entirely, because we can’t make the others learn to listen.  We can only take charge of ourselves;but this will work to raise our levels of enjoyment in life immensely!   And what more can we ask for than to be responsible for our own happiness!?!?  OH…and to know when to walk away!

You have the POWER!

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“Too often we underestimate the power of a touch, a smile, a kind word, a listening ear, an honest compliment, or the smallest act of caring, all of which have the potential to turn a life around.”~ Leo Buscaglia

You have the power! Maybe you did not realize it, but you do! Try smiling more often, or speaking up and saying something nice and unexpected, see how it affects others. Some days you will not see much reaction, some days you may feel like ” why do I bother?” but then there are those days when you’ll be rewarded beyond measure for your efforts! And here is the thing……you have no idea when and where that reward will come! No idea! None. Sorry!

Does that mean you should not do it? Gosh I hope not! Just think what it will do for YOU, each and every day, as you practice the art of gratitude and kindness! Flex those muscles! Get ready for those rewards! It is worth it!

Much Peace and Love~ Christine