Hello Spring!

flower

Happy Spring to you!  Well, it has been some time now since I have been here on my blog. No reason other than we moved to Florida in the last few months and it has taken a lot of my time away from other things.  Including writing!

So, yes we moved from Indiana to Northeastern Florida in Oct 2017. This has been a goal of mine for quite some time now. I am excited that it became a reality and so far we love living here!

Why the move? Honestly the biggest reason was that it was time for me to grow up and let go of my adult children!  It didnt seem to be something I could accomplish living with in a few miles of them all, so we moved 1000 miles away. It was not just for me, it was for them too.  I am trying to do us all a service!  Due to the nature of our lives as they were growing up, I think we are all a little bit co-dependent. I want more for my children than a dysfunctional relationship with their mom!  LOL   Okay, I am sure it is not all that bad, but really the problem lies within me and my psyche….. if you have been around for awhile then you know I had my life all planned out in a certain manner and it all blew up in my face! Well, I was having a hard time letting go, I really wanted that family compound! All the kids and grandkids under one roof, or if not one roof then within walking distance of each other. Then, like a slap in the face, other people were getting my dreams……… I’m not even sure they had spent their lives pining for it as I had. LOL

That is how life works! It does what it wants, not what you want. Quite often it gives you something you never knew you wanted. So I try (now) to roll with it. I know God has plans for me so I just keep moving forward. I feel like in Indiana I had stopped moving forward, I was stuck in one place waiting…waiting….waiting for that life I had spent my entire momhood praying and planning for!  It had passed me by and I was done mourning it and wishing it back. I wanted to appreciate what I did have, past and present, and I wanted to mold myself a new life. So I did.

And here I am in NE Florida! Living a life that is taking some getting used to! Not that it is a bad thing, it is not! It is just different. An entirely different life than I ever imagined for myself!! Wow!!! How different!! And of course, my kids are not with me. I never ever in a million years thought I would say that! But God will make you so uncomfortable that you will have no choice but to make changes you never thought possible!  And so here I am.

I hope to be here, on this blog, a lot more than I have been. You know my book was published last May. I have not yet begun a new one, although I have ideas. But I have been busy. I am also a travel agent that specializes in cruising and Disney….to that end I have  been making some YouTube videos about our adventures. Recently we cruised with Celebrity on the Equinox. I do not know if you have an interest in this type of thing, but if you do please feel free to check out my channel. The name of it is Desperately Seeking Christine.  Apropos…no?  lol   If you choose to visit and subscribe you will be welcome! And hopefully enjoy!

In the meantime I do hope to see you around more often!  Hope you are well. ~ I love you!

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Forgive….. but forget?

There are things we never forget in life. Some good. Some bad. I work on forgetting the bad. Thing is, I’ve forgiven anyone that may be responsible for the bad , yes even me. But there are some things I can’t seem to forget. Forgive yes, forget….. not yet.

Abuse is something that is hard to forget. I feel like I have accomplished a lot by forgiving. And I do forgive. 100%. Why can’t I forget? It may be the trauma of it. I still, at the oddest moments, can remember being hit over and over and over again. In my face. Over and over. So many things go through your mind… I don’t remember pain, but I remember the fear. And the bewilderment. I think, to this day, the bewilderment is still there.

Oh and I remember the person who saved me that day too. The person who stepped in and stopped the madness.

The story didn’t end there. But it doesn’t matter. What matters is what I have done with my life.

You know we all make mistakes. We all deal with our crap in different ways. We all can either learn from it or not. We can also learn to forgive or not.

There are so many choices in this life. Well, actually that is all this life is, one choice after another.

Man I’m rambling. I do that sometimes.

I wish you all well. I love you. And I am here to listen to anyone that may need to talk.

Sometimes people think I’m way too dramatic. And that I seek attention. Trust me, I don’t. As a matter of fact… attention is something I hide from mostly.

I’ve had a pretty dramatic life. I “feel” very deeply. I don’t hide that well. And truth is I don’t care to! Love me or hate me….. I have deep scars and I choose to fill those scars with love. And that love is for others. I want to be here for you.

It’s what I want. It’s how I choose to “recover” from life. ❤️

**if you actually read to the end of this long ramble….. thank you. I’ve just shared with you something that I’ve never shared with anyone….. for no other reason than to say- I know some stuff cause I’ve been through some stuff and I’m here if you want to talk.

Wow! Goodbye 2017!

It has been a whirlwind kind of a year for me! It has been amazing! It’s making me super excited for 2018! I can’t begin to imagine what the new year holds for me!

It has taken me many years to finally begin to get healthy. It wasn’t until I found Omnitrition that I was able to get some control over my health and weight. It’s been a long journey but a very satisfying one! I love Omnitrition! The products have changed my life. I have lost (and maintained it since May) 46.2 lbs!

2017 was also the year of manifesting dreams! We sold our house in Sept 2016 when I declared to my husband that I wanted to live in St Augustine, FL! So I began a year long effort to make my dream of living in St Augustine, FL a reality! There were many pitfalls and heartaches along the way. But as of Oct 2017 we are officially residents of St Augustine….. not “close to” but IN St Augustine!

It’s been an amazing year! I can’t wait to herald in 2018 and see what it brings!

Merry Christmas to you and yours! May you have an inspired 2018! ❤️<<<<<<<
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